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A couple stands by the water, hand in hand

A woman came to see me the other day with complaints about her significant other.  It seems that her partner was cheating on her.  And then, she caught him again after he had promised to stop seeing the other person.  She was at a loss about what to do.  She wanted to know what she was doing to cause her partner to cheat.

Her condition was what we used to call co-dependent.  Are you co-dependent?  The signs of co-dependency among others are:

  • Having difficulty making decisions in a relationship
  • Having difficulty identifying your own feelings
  • Lacking trust in yourself and having poor self-esteem
  • Having fears of abandonment or an obsessive need for approval
  • Having an unhealthy dependence on relationships, even at your own cost
  • Having an exaggerated sense of responsibility for the actions of others

Seeking or maintaining relationships that are not fulfilling or healthy could be a sign that you are codependent.  But codependency can be successfully treated, and the individual can recover.