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couple-28813_640On the wall of my office hangs a portrait of a woman and man embraced in a dance.  Over the years, I have found it useful to refer to this portrait to help couples understand how couples therapy can help and what I do as a couples/family therapist.  Discussing what goes on between the portrayed dancing couple sometimes becomes an analogy for discussing what is present or absent from the couple’s own relationship.   It provides a safe way to talk about what both parties want in their relationship with each other. Referring to the dancing couple, helps couples understand that I intend to work on developing a new process between them (a new dance), one that enriches, one that is synchronistic and one that seems to have a growing life of its own if both partners are in step. Being keen to this, the distressed partners often come into treatment asking to work on their communication.  Indeed it is essential for the couple to communicate about their dance and what both partners need and feel if they are to dance together well.  As couples engage in discussions about how to communicate their needs clearly to each other and about how to also listen deeply, they come to realize that the dance they seek to invent with each other involves more than just the words that partners say to each other.  It is the absence or presence of your partner looking deeply into your eyes with affection.  It is sensing and picking up on each other’s effort to make amends and move forward.   When this becomes difficult or stops happening and you are ready to ask for help, this is what a couples therapist can offer you and your partner.  If or when the path you walk upon with your partner seems closed but you do not want to give up . . .  because the relationship still means to much to you, we invite you to call us at Compass Family Counseling where we have a team of skilled licensed counselors throughout Metropolitan Denver who are ready to help and ready to respond quickly to your call.  We can make it easy to find the expert you are looking for.   By Russ Urrutia, Denver Spanish Speaking Therapist, LCSW Compass Campus Counseling Provider [email protected]